Knit 1, Crochet 2

Cracking myself up

I've been seeing this on all sorts of blogs and every one of them just cracks me up. So, of course, I had to jump on the bandwagon.

You google "{insert your name here} needs" and post a few of the funniest ones. I know you want to know my top 10.

1. Heather needs men...now! (Brian is gonna love that one)
2. Heather needs a rest.
3. Heather needs a childhood. (yea, rather sad. Especially if you know the happiness vampires, also known as my freaking family.)
4. Heather needs two therapists. (WTF?!? Is the universe trying to tell me something here? Not one, but 2?)
5. Heather's breasts. (ummm...yea...)
6. Heather is neato. (And very cool, thank you. Thank you very much.)
7. Heather needs a female parent who can help show her appropriate ways to attract the attention of guys and learn how to choose appropriate partners. (now that is so damn funny, I can't even stand it.)
8. Miss Heather needs to stick to her career as an country artist. (Yeee haw!!)
9. Heather needs to be kept moist. Do not allow to dry out. (I think I just snorted my tea.)
10. Heather needs to seriously consider adding kibble to her diet. (Does that come chocolate flavored?)

Hrmpf. Where is the "Heather needs a week-long spa vacation"? Or "Heather needs more yarn"? Obviously I just need to be moist, get therapy and eat dog food. Oh, and start liking country music, which I hate, because my career will be taking off any day now.

Want to laugh some more? Go rent the remake of "The Longest Yard". (Whoa, typed yarn instead of yard. Would that be on a cone?) Hysterical movie. I'll be buying that one for sure because I haven't laughed that hard in a long time.

Have a fabulous day. I'm off to get me some men. After which I'll obviously need a rest. Heh.

Posted by Heather at 10:58 AM